This Had Better Be Good

Since i have been off the air for so long you would think my first post back might be worth the wait.  This is highly unlikely and if you are looking for a blog entry roughly on par with the recent DVD release of the latest installment of the Bourne trilogy, you may want to change the channel. 

Here is my latest theory.  Divorce is a lot like a Dyson vacuum.  The latest technology in sucking.  Life sucking.  As in sucking the joy, happiness and meaning out of life.  Ok, so there is rather a lot of joy after divorce... and happiness.  Also meaning.  Sleeping through the night is easier.  And if you snore, who cares?  Not to mention that I can feel free to rest my head on my left hand and not worry about those pesky and embarrassing wedding ring imprints on my face.   I got custody of the Dyson in our settlement, so you can rest as ease knowing that my divorced floors are clean.  Which might very well have been one of the reasons my failing marriage failed so spectacularly... I never vacuumed when i had the chance.  How i regret this.

Modern Toddler and Modern Pre-Schooler provide my life with all the joy and meaning a person could reasonably ask for in the world today.  I hesitate to admit this, but I think divorce might actually be making me a better mom.  So let's see... clean floors, better parent, much less laundry (which truth be told I never did much of in my past married life - another symptom?) maybe there is in fact life after divorce.  I am getting paid for every time I type divorce and I figure if i drop the word enough it will feel normal and painless.

So far that is not working out so well.