Better Pharmaceutical Living

I see doctors like most people see movies. Like most people see movies before they have children. Or maybe shortly after they have children cause they feel like they are the only people in the world who need movies that badly, movies and the popcorn available at movies. Ok this metaphor has gone on long enough. I am of course referring to the couch and Kleenex variety of doctors. And the wide selection of disorder correcting, mood stabilizing, happiness inducing little wonders I like to call "mommy's vitamins" It is sort of true. So, today I celebrate the end of breast-feeding. Also I mourn this loss, my weak mind and less than perfect marriage may not survive another pregnancy and first year of no-life baby days, so this may in fact be the very last time I experience this wonderful, profoundly intense and otherwise ridiculously painful act of motherhood. Sad. And a bit liberating! No breast-feeding means the skies can part and rain down a plethora of pharmaceutical choices. This may sound a bit fishy to you, but pregnancy and nursing are pretty hard on the not so select few of us fighting a disorder or two. Also this weekend marked the first annual switching of the kids. My husband has taken over the baby duty, so we can break those last two nursing times, and I can adjust to some new "vitamins". So tonight, i get to take a happy pill and soar off into beautiful, baby monitor free sleep. I can hardly type fast enough I am so excited.

Back to the movies/doctors. I have the MD for the meds, the PHD for the hrs of ranting, crying and general discontent with my current state of mind. I do believe that we have gotten down to the heart of most of my drama and are making some good progress. (progress = a step or two out of hell, still a rather warm climate, but less actual burning flesh) I am hopefully on my way back from the little mental vacation I have been on and should be able to return to society by the next presidential election. The stress, loneliness, boredom and anxiety that is my life as wife and mother are not particularly original... I know, been there, done that. But I seem to have the decision making ability of warm yogurt and somewhere along the way i lost myself. Hard to imagine, because i gained the "freshman antidepressant Paxil CR 25" and am roughly the size of the couches i am paying the big bucks on which to sit and complain about the size of my "problems". This was funny when i was preggers, however now, it is slightly less than.

Pity, party of one? Yep. Here's the deal, my shrink says that I can call and talk to her voicemail when she is on vacation next week. Mostly she was kidding and just meant that if i had any great successes, to be sure to share them so we can talk about the odorless excrement i produce and how it has multiplied since our last meeting. I am not seriously going to call. Seriously. I might write one or two down, that is not completely unleashed right? Oh, did i mention how much praise I need? Just click on comments below.